Tropi-nazi fun.

There is one thing in the world that is worse than nazism.
It is passive-nazism.

I have received this mail yesterday.

O fabricante do brinquedo ‘Lula de Pelúcia’ está fazendo um recall para troca ou devolução do dinheiro devido a uma série de falhas de fabricação listadas abaixo:

1) Falta um dedo.
2) Tem a fala presa.
3) É mentiroso.
4 ) Só diz ‘Eu não sabia’.
5 ) Não tem cérebro.
6) Não pára em casa! Só quer viajar para o exterior.
7 ) Só anda em más companhias, com dois outros bonecos
encrenqueiros, o ‘Evo de Coca’ e o ‘Chavez de Petróleo’.
8 ) Não existe na versão movido (sic) a pilha, só na movido a álcool.
9 ) Pode ser adquirido facilmente com utilização de Cartão
Corporativo.
10 ) A boneca que faz par não presta para nada.

Troque com urgência na ‘urna eleitoral’ mais próxima.

***

A direita elite classe média brasileira adora estar na oposição. Se xingar gente pobre e feia já era divertido antes imagine agora. Quem precisa de fundamento quando se tem um presidente nordestino, sem dedo e língua-presa pra jogar pedra?

Politics are fun fun fun!

Eu fico pensando se o Obama fosse presidente do Brasil.
Preto, com uma mulher preta e feia, com duas pretinhas.
Qual piada o Caco Antibes ia fazer primeiro?
Com qual macaco a gente ia fazer charges do nosso presidente?
E se ele “só quer viajar para o exterior”, de qual quilombo ele ia estar fugindo?

Quem precisa de capuz branco pontudo quando um bicho de pelúcia faz todo o serviço?

“How do you sell luxury in a post-luxury age?”

You redefine luxury, that’s how you sell it. Luxury goods are still selling a lot, in Moscow, Dubai and Hong Kong. And fashion is one ambicious bitch. For years now we see all high-end brands investing all they can in these markets. And adapting themselves for their new favourite clients. That’s right. Get those sheikhs coutured.

It should be more than obvious by now that none of this is about class and quality. Luxury goods are about power and exclusivity. Designed for rich people. Don’t blame them for having bad taste.

READ THE ARTICLE HERE.

The List of Widsom vol.1

It took me some time, as probably happened to Buddha or Moses, to get this list together. It takes a lot of meditation and awareness, and infinite modesty, to find the truly Truth.

Behold the List of Wisdom. Thou shall not read this list in vain.

***

– If you think your life is hard, you should try it on high–heels.

– There’s probably no god. Now stop worrying and enjoy your life.

– There is no beauty without craziness. You can’t be pretty without going a little crazy.

- White leather boots should be forbidden by law.

– Bureaucracy should be considered a crime.

– Prostitution should be legalized, organized and treated as a real career. Whore legal rights NOW.

– Never mind very handsome men. They are all gay anyway.

- Never mind very old people. They’re all gonna die soon.

– Our mouths are not our vaginas. So don’t ask us to suck hard.

– Brittany Murphy is weird, Scarlett Johansson is a very bad actress and Vin Diesel could actually give a very handy husband.

– Make-up standards should be reviewed in some countries. They’re getting too…creative.

– Why oh why do men still use wigs?

– Do not use plastic bags. I don’t wanna hear your theories, just STOP USING THEM.

– There is, although people often mistake it, a considerable difference between love and a fucking amazing orgasm.

– “There is no unselfish good deeds, sorry.” (Joey Tribbiani)

– Pity and compassion are arrogance in disguise.

– If telling you that he’s gonna marry and have kids is what it takes for a fortune teller to convince you to move on, she will do it.

– There is absolutely nothing, not a single thing, that money can’t buy in Brazil.

– Deep inside some Europeans wish the Earth was plane and Christopher Columbus has never had that stupid idea.

– According to the bible, the antichrist would rise in actual times, would profane all words against god and would make use of all 7 sins to rule the world and be respected and followed by all mankind. There’s only one person who fits the profile: Paris Hilton.

- “When it gets down to having to use violence, then you’re playing the system’s game. The establishment irritates you, pull your beard and flick your face, to make you fight, BECAUSE ONCE THEY HAVE YOU VIOLENT, THEY KNOW HOW TO HANDLE YOU.” (John Lennon)

– You know what they say: bigger the foot, larger is happiness.

Fight Club. In Hot Masala.

Tyler Durden said: “It’s only after we’ve lost everything that we’re free to do anything.” So when you lose your dignity, you’ll be ready to watch Fight Club – Members Only, a 2004 Bollywood film, starring everybody we don’t know. Yet.

There is dance. There is music. There is beautiful beaches and mountains landcapes. Slow-motion hair-in-the-air scenes. And there is….LAMBADA. In other others, it’s all about David Fincher.

Why the name is Fight Club actually we don’t know. Because, fight, I mean real fight, there is none. Only if you consider Shakira’s moves contest a fight. It could be.

But who the fuck cares? Wasn’t it all about losing the ego, losing your job, your wallet, your grande latte, your search for coolness?

Well, Tyler, here’s your paradise.

And the best for last.

It will make you feel … good.

www.michaelmoore.com

I am following this blog.

http://quantotempodura.wordpress.com/

Our own version of the Oceanic 815.

I wish it was a joke, a very bad-taste promotion for a local version of Lost. But it’s not.
Until now AirFrance have NO IDEA of what really happened to the flight AF447.

We sincerely hope they are right now safe and sound, in a very misterious island…

In English: French plane lost in ocean storm

Em Português: Airbus tinha 80 brasileiros a bordo, segundo a Air France.

En Español: Un avión de Air France desaparece sobre el Atlántico con 228 personas a bordo.

FYI.

Quem dirira…A crise financeira não poupou nem mesmo a modelo mais bem paga do mundo.

Glamurama has recently posted on its website that the economic crisis has made Gisele Bündchen 10 million dollars poorer, according to Forbes. So far, so good. Or bad, poor Gisele. Bad crisis. No donut for you.

Although that was not exactly what Forbes said. The piece was actually pointing that the modeling industry has been hard-hit by the economic crisis, but the value of the beauties at the top is as strong as ever. Gisele earned 10 million less this year mostly because of the “loss of Victoria’s Secret and other contracts.” And let’s remind that it was her decision to leave Victoria’s Secret, as they wouldn’t raise her 5 million dollar annual salary.

I wouldn’t blame the devil crisis. I would say it’s just business. After all, even with “only” 25 million dollars a year, she’s still numer one of the list, followed by Heidi Klum, making 16 million, with 35 years-old and three kids. Now THAT’S a hardworker.

So now you know.

Still I think it’s funny the surprising tone in Glamurama’s article. Translating, it says “Who would have thought…financial crisis haven’t even spare the world’s most well-paid model”. This is funny – to begin with “who would have thought”.

Of course. In a country like Brazil, who would have thought that people’s little problems like “economic crisis” would affect the rich and famous?
Quite a scandal.

www.WTF.com.br

Vem cá, a gente não cansa desse CIRCO, não?

Exposição
A Feiticeira Joana Prado decidiu exibir o parto de seu terceiro bebê, uma menina, Kyara, com o lutador Vitor Belfort. Ela fará uma espécie de reality show no “WTN Absoluta”, seu programa na internet, que vai ao ar no www.wtn.com.br. Joana vai mostrar desde as contrações até o parto.

Ok.

“Feiticeira” com maiúscula. O que extamamente isso significa?
“Kyara”… … … … … oh meu deus, ela quer dizer CHIARA??
E o que diabos quer dizer “uma espécie de reality show”? É tipo assim, um programa bacana, que mistura tipo assim, várias coisas???

É a nação do “Se Vira nos 30″: Uns fazem anal giratório. Outros fazem isso.

…

Não, eu quero dizer outra coisa.
Eu gosto muito da Joana Prado. Simpatizo horrores. Não me perguntem por quê. Mas eu juro que não entendo como ela ainda se submente a esse circo, a esse tipo de convite, no mínimo deprimente, de ter um programa chamado “Absoluta” numa TV Online.

Minha filha, não faça isso. Você não precisa mais disso. Tira esse véu da cara de uma vez por todas e ponha um pouco de respeito. Pegue o último suspiro de dignidade que lhe resta e vá alimentar a boca dos seus filhos com um trabalho decente.

Vai, sinceramente. Ninguém aqui é Estados Unidos pra fazer de qualquer coisa um espetáculo. Vc vai usar o nascimento da sua filha como um golpe barato de promoção de um programa que até você sabe que não tem futuro? É tão fácil assim te persuadir?

Shame on you, Joana. Que vergonha.

Alice in Pogoland.

Nick Bertke. Remember that name. Also known as Pogo.

Don’t ask me how I’ve got to this kid. All I know is after one day I have downloaded almost everything has has put his hands on.
Especially what comes next.
90% of these tracks are made with sounds from the movie.

I simply can’t stop listening to it.

“Alice”

“Expialidocious”

http://www.myspace.com/pogotracks

Ask the gods.

Or the goddess.

The tropical stablishment.

You wake up when there’s still dark because you have to go to the gym. Or you gotta go surfing. Of course you surf. You’re scumbag yuppie but you keep fighting the waves. For breakfast you use your mixer to do a super juice of carrots, beetroot, water-cress and eggs because you not only know exactly what your body needs, but what it doesn’t. You don’t drink coffe. And bread and butter is a no-no combination.

You’re married, because at some point of your life you’ve realized that your parents were right after all and the right thing to do is to marry. You have a young wife, as hypnotized as you. You’re making big plans for your future, and you work your ass off because that is your duty as a man. You’ve quit smoking not long ago. But you keep stiring it up, little darling. Because you’re not a workaholic yuppie, you’re a cool surfer boy. And you don’t forget your social life. So you don’t give up happy hours at fridays though you know beer makes you look fat, nor barbecues on sundays though you know meat is not good for your soul. No one’s a control-freak here right? But just in case you will push harder in the gym on monday morning and you’ll pass the entire week eating little salad.

Then you go back to your house, eat little fish or little grilled chicken. You drink a fine glass of wine, because sometimes you must celebrate your life. And you always go to bed very early, not because you’re tired, but because you’re good boy, aren’t ya?

And you’re happy that way. Controlled, numbed, doomed into routine that only’s gonna delay your nervous breakdown, but right now you can’t help yourself of exploding in self-pride.
God loves you so much, doesn’t he?

talk about waiting…

Sicko has just hit the Spanish theathers. Only 2 YEARS after its release! Yay!!
…

Just in case, don’t tell any Spanish guy that Bruce Willis was a ghost in 1999.

“The Hottest Spot of North Havana…”

Wolverine At The Copa.
Is it hot in here or is it just me?

Oi?

Economic crisis makes people have weird ideas.
Fashion’s a whore, everybody knows that, but now Fashion also have to manage to pay less taxes.
How do you do that? With weird ideas like that. If everybody’s buying garbage like Lady Gaga, why wouldn’t they buy a t-shirt of a wizard?

After all, it’s for a good cause.

MANGO y Paulo Coelho unidos por una causa solidaria.

My Heart is Broken.

Why, WHY, did she do this?

She was the most influent trendsetter in world fashion since she has started in Chloé. All her colours and cuts has been synomyn of good taste and high style for years, it has been THE reference to all the industry.

We almost forgot who her father is, for crying out loud!

What in the world were you thinking when you put together this outfit? Everyone in Met Gala could have made mistakes: Madonna is expected (although I liked it, why not), and Rihanna, well, when the fuck did she ever dressed well anyway? But you…not you. You are the queen of good taste.

My heart is broken.

God Bless Brazilian Boyfriends; part II.

Confirmed: Madonna will do Louis Vuitton campaign again

Here’s the math:

Louis Vuitton + Marc Jacobs = Madonna on campaign for 2009.

But, (Louis Vuitton – $$$ + swineflu) + (Marc Jacobs + Brazilian fiancé) = Madonna + Jesus Luz for campaign 2010.

Our style will make history, quod erat demonstrandum.

Aren’t we proud?

PORT – Pepe é punido por 10 jogos volta a jogar só na próxima temporada
ESP – Pepe: “No sé que me ha pasado, merezco un castigo”
ENG – Real Madrid’s Pepe banned for 10 matches for Getafe rampage

My review on Blindness.

* This is the japanese poster, as it is obvious. You go google the other ones.

IMDB info of “Blindness”
Blindess official website

- It is very interesting the way Fernando Meirelles shot in São Paulo. Most of the times it looked like a complete fictitious city; other times it felt so good to recognize it in unusual but beautiful angles, though into a deranged context. It was a perfect scenario for such story.

- There is a clear parallel between Blindness and George Romero’s zombies. After an epidemical incident, the human race is converted to crawling, disoriented and hungry monsters. But unlike the zombies, in Blindness we do not act inhuman out of survival – we do it out of fear.

- Most of the times we felt like watching a “28 Weeks Later” or something like that. But the whiteness and the unmistakeable Brazilian touch has given the movie a total different – and more elegant I must say – atmosphere for the what-if-it-happened kind of movie.

- Julianne Moore was brilliant. Felt like she has done Brazilian productions since forever. She was absolutely inmmersed in the story, as in the futuristic chaotic grey of São Paulo. Not the same about Ruffalo, though. I couldn’t forget he was that cop in moustache that once fucked Meg Ryan.

- Alice Braga was beautiful and her accent is SO MUCH better than her auntie’s.

- Gael García could have made it better. He didn’t convince me as a bad guy. I would have put somebody else, somebody like….Jesus, why do I always think of Vicent Cassel for disgusting roles?

- And it wasn’t funny enough when he sang like Steve Wonder, though the idea was really good.

- I didn’t get the end part. Why exactly does she say that last line?

There’s a portuguese version of this post here.

About this blog’s appearance.

I used to have a blogger blog. It was so much easier to set the page the way you wanted. You only had to learn some basics about HTML and voilá. Now, in WordPress, you have to make sacrifices.

I mean, come on, as if life wasn’t hard enough.

If you want a custom header, you may not have it in the size you want. If you have it in the proper size you may not have it with the number of columns you want. And forget about chosing colour. You can only change some colours and images in some templates, not all of them. If you want something, you’ll have to give up something else obligatory.

That’s the way WordPress is. Like a relationship. Without the sex.

I’ll keep trying my best to make this blog to look the way it must be. But until then, nevermind if you see wierd stuff going on around here.